For the Salemen and Financial Guys Out There a #Joke

I had to share this seeing as I use to be on the financial side of the business world.

A FEW GOOD SALESMEN

Sales: "You want answers?"

Finance: "I think we are entitled to them!"

Sales: "You want answers?!"

Finance: "I want the truth!"

Sales: "You can't handle the truth!!!"

Sales (continuing): "Son, we live in a world that requires revenue.

And that revenue must be brought in by people with elite skills.

Who's going to #nd it? You, Mr. Finance? You, Mr. Operations?

We have a greater responsibility than you can possibly fathom.

You scoff at the sales division and you curse our lucrative incentives.

You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what we know:

That while the cost of business results are excessive, it drives revenue.

And my very existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you,

Drives REVENUE!

You don't want to know the truth because deep down in places you don't

talk about at sta( meetings ...you want me on that call. You NEED me on

that call!

We use words like upgrades, another round, top-shelf, medium-rare,

on-the-rocks, Cabernet, Cohiba and foursome.

We use these words as the backbone of a life spent negotiating

something. You use them as a punch line!

I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to people

who rise and sleep under the very blanket of revenue I provide

and then question the manner in which I provide it. I would rather you

just said "thank you" and went on your way.

Otherwise I suggest you pick up a phone and make some sales calls.

Either way, I don't give a damn what you think you're entitled to!"

Finance: "Did you expense the lap dancers?"

Sales: "I did the job I was hired to do."

Finance: "Did you expense the lap dancers?!"

Sales: "YOU’RE DAMM RIGHT I DID !!"

Banished Scroundrel a #MFRWHooks for #MFRWauthor Retweet Day by @AnitaPhilmar

Today, I'm sharing excerpts from Banished Scroundrel

Excerpt from Banished Scoundrel

Kitty.

The panther turned and stared at the castle. Jack? What are you doing here?

He stepped out from his hiding place. The light from the night beast lit the area in an eerie glow. Unwilling to expose himself to danger, he tossed his head back at the structure glowing in the distance. Many of the bedroom windows faced the lake.

Why don’t we move to a more secure area? I don’t want anyone from Sloan’s party to see us. He turned.

No, Jack. Even though you’ve caught me in my panther form, I’m not following you into the underbrush. I’ve read that male cats have an insatiable hunger to mate. She shuffled her paws in the sand and strolled along the shoreline.

But wait! With a quick burst, he covered the ground between them. He closed his mouth around the hairs on the back of her neck and tugged.

She sighed and stopped. Jack, I’m not fucking you in this form. A quick twist of her head and she broke free of his grip. Now stop.

A deep purr rumbled from his chest. He couldn’t allow her to escape.

Read more on my website 

or find at amazon

http://bit.ly/serBanishScroun

Thanks for doing the hop and make sure to check out the other authors on the list,

Anita

Liberty with a #HolidayRecipe both by @KimHeadlee

Wanted to Gear Up for this Years #HolidayRecipe Exchange and repost a few from 2014

Jam-filled Crescent Rolls  Ingredients:

• 1 tube of pre-cut crescent roll dough
• Your favorite jam(s)
• Melted butter (optional)

Instructions:

• Preheat oven as directed on the package for the type of baking sheet or pan you plan to use.
• Open tube and unroll each triangle.
• Spread a small amount of jam across the base of the triangle, no more than halfway toward the point. This is the tricky part, because the jam can ooze out and burn during baking.
• Roll the triangle loosely and place on baking sheet.
• Brush with a little melted butter (optional).
• Repeat for the remaining triangles, leaving at least 2 inches between crescents.
• Bake as directed on the package, and do not over-bake!
• Cool before serving. The jam can get very hot.

Love this book? Please join Kim's All-Stars Street Team! 

TITLE – Liberty, second edition

SERIES – N/A

AUTHOR – Kim Iverson Headlee

GENRE – Historical Romance

PUBLICATION DATE – December 2014

LENGTH (Pages/# Words) – 462 pages/118K words

PUBLISHER – Pendragon Cove Press

COVER DESIGNER – Natasha Brown

“When the legend becomes fact, 

print the legend.”

Please follow the Pre-Order & Launch Blog Tour

December 8-19

And don't forget to enter this great giveaway!

Next blog tour is January 30 - February 28, 2015. 
Signup link coming soon!

SYNOPSIS

They hailed her “Liberty,” but she was free only to obey—or die.

Betrayed by her father and sold as payment of a Roman tax debt to fight in Londinium’s arena, gladiatrix-slave Rhyddes feels like a wild beast in a gilded cage. Celtic warrior blood flows in her veins, but Roman masters own her body. She clings to her vow that no man shall claim her soul, though Marcus Calpurnius Aquila, son of the Roman governor, makes her yearn for a love she believes impossible.

Groomed to follow in his father’s footsteps and trapped in a politically advantageous betrothal, Aquila prefers the purity of combat on the amphitheater sands to the sinister intrigues of imperial politics, and the raw power and athletic grace of the flame-haired Libertas to the adoring deference of Rome’s noblewomen.

When a plot to overthrow Caesar ensnares them as pawns in the dark design, Aquila must choose between the Celtic slave who has won his heart and the empire to which they both owe allegiance. Trusting no man and knowing the opposite of obedience is death, the only liberty offered to any slave, Rhyddes must embrace her arena name—and the love of a man willing to sacrifice everything to forge a future with her.

BUY & TBR LINKS

AMAZON KINDLE: US – UK  – CA – AU
NOOK – INKTERA – ITUNES – KOBO – SCRIBD – SMASHWORDS

Paperback edition forthcoming!

EXCERPT

The warrior-woman looked heavier by at least two stone, but Rhyddes pinned her chest with her knee. She dropped the pitchfork and grasped her dagger, yanking it free. Grabbing a fistful of limed hair, she wrestled the woman’s head to one side to expose her neck.

The Pict bucked and twisted, trying to break Rhyddes’s grip. ’Twas not much different than wrestling a fever-mad calf.

Rhyddes’s deft slice ended the threat.

Blood spurted from the woman’s neck in sickening pulses.

Rhyddes stood, panting, her stomach churning with the magnitude of what she’d done. ’Twas no suffering animal she’d killed—and it could have been her lying there, pumping her lifeblood into the mud.

Bile seared her throat, making her gag. Pain lanced her stomach. Bent double, she retched out the remains of her morning meal, spattering the corpse.

After spitting out the last bitter mouthful and wiping her lips with the back of her hand, she drew a deep breath and straightened. As she turned a slow circle, her senses taking in the sights and sounds and stench of the devastation surrounding her, she wished she had not prevailed.

The news grew worse as she sprinted toward the lodge.

Of her seven brothers, the Picts had left Ian and Gwydion dead, her father and Owen wounded, the lodge and three outbuildings torched. She ran a fingertip over the crusted blood of her scratch, and she couldn’t suppress a surge of guilt.

Mayhap, she thought through the blinding tears as she ran to help what was left of her family, ’twould have been better had she died in the Pict’s stead.

The surviving raiders were galloping toward the tree line with half the cattle. The remaining stock lay stiffening in the fields, already attracting carrion birds.

Three days later, the disaster attracted scavengers of an altogether different sort.

Love this book? Please join Kim's All-Stars Street Team!

Older cover by HQN Books, 2006:

Please RT 5* #Liberty by @KimHeadlee ancient Rome historical romance 99 cents! #BYNR #ASMSG #IARTG

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00OQCXLUE

Happy Holidays everyone,

Anita

Celebrating the #NewRelease CEO's Widow with a #freebook by @AuthorTinaGayle #ASMSG

To celebrate her new release of the last book in her Executive Wives’ Club series. Tina Gayle is offering the first book “Marketing Exec’s Widow” #free from Oct. 3 – 7. CEO’s Widow comes out Oct. 8, but you can be picked it up now on pre-order.

Executives' Wives' Club series

Genre: Contemporary Romance with strong women fiction elements

Four women...
One fatal car wreck...
Everyone's lives changed...

Marketing Exec’s Widow

 

Jennifer Larson, having lost her husband, friends and the perfect life she’d had plan, now faces the biggest challenge of her life, moving into an unplanned future. While the rest of the Executive Wife Club is still wallowing in the past, Jen is tempted into the future by a sexy chiropractor, Hagan Chaney.

But does he really love her or is he only after her money?

Check out the 5 star review at https://readersfavorite.com/book-review/marketing-execs-widow

CEO’s Widow

 

Tagline: Facing the possibility of having breast cancer, Marianne must decide if she wants to give love another chance and build a future with whatever time she may have left.

 Blurb:

After surviving the grief from her husband’s death, Marianne Clark has built a new life with the help of the other Executive Wives. She plans to enjoy grandchildren and friends until her doctor tells her he found a lump in her breast. Her world turned upside down. She re-evaluates her priorities and decides she grab hold of life with both hands.

Knox Turner lost is first wife to cancer. He’s determined not to let Marianne face this challenge alone. 

Can this couple face the trails ahead and build a future together?

Excerpt:

“Wait—”

“Marianne, what are you doing here?” Sylvia Wilshire stood in the middle of the hallway. Tall and slender, she offered a radiant smile and brushed a wayward hand through her dark auburn hair. As beautiful as ever, Marianne couldn’t help but marvel at how her friend had changed in the last two years. She’d lost over a hundred pounds and had married Vince Wilshire. He also happened to be like both of their deceased husbands, an executive for Knox.

Sylvia strolled forward with the grace of a model, her green-eyed gaze full of curiosity. “I just drop by to talk to Vince for a minute.”

The man in question walked through the doorway of another office. He winked at Marianne and slid an arm around Sylvia’s shoulder. “It looks like these two beauties are keeping us from our conference call.”

 “Damn,” Knox groaned and checked his watch. “We better get in there before Foster has a cow because we’re late.”

Marianne stepped aside to give him room to walk around her.

He paused next to her and glared. “I’ll call you later, and we’ll work out a time for us to get together.”

Tempted to disagree with his plan, she proposed instead, “As long as it doesn’t interfere with my other social plans.”

He groaned and dropped a kiss on her cheek. “Someday I’m going to be the first and last thing you see every day. Then your activity calendar won’t matter.”

She lifted her hand ready to point out he shouldn’t say things like that to her in front of their friends. “Knox—”

Vince tugged on Knox’s arm and interrupted, “Come on, buddy before you get yourself in more trouble than you can get out of.”

Buy Links:

Available at Amazon Worldwide exclusively:

http://amzn.to/1MUiDQ5

Newsletter:

If you would like to sign up to be an exclusive member of Tina’s List simple visit:

http://www.tinagayle.net/newsletter.html

You'll receive a free short story – “My Future StepBrother.” This story leads you right into the story of the CEO’s Widow.

Author Bio:

Tina Gayle grew up a dreamer and loved to escape into the world of books.

After years of working in the business world doing a variety of jobs, she decided to try her hand at writing and hope to incorporate the joy of being a mother into her books.

Currently working on a series about four executive wives, she is excited about combining elements of women fiction with the passion of romance. The first three books have been released and the last one is coming out in 2015.

Married twenty-five years, she and her husband love to travel and play golf.  She can’t wait for Mike to retire so they can do more of both.

Read the first chapter of any of her books by visiting her website.

Find Tina Gayle everywhere

Home - www.tinagayle.net
Blog - www.tinagayle.blogspot.com
Twitter - https://twitter.com/#!/AuthorTinaGayle
Goodread - http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/1641826.Tina_Gayle
Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/pages/Author-Tina-Gayle/214633841921560?ref=hl
Google + - https://plus.google.com
Linkin - http://www.linkedin.com/pub/tina-gayle/11/689/759

Amazon Author Page http://www.amazon.com/Tina-Gayle/e/B002BM9GR8

Thanks Tina, I'll make sure to go check it out,

Anita

Boxset - Paws and Claws - #Authors Ryanne Hawk and Stikki Minaj

Now available for only 99cent.

BOOK LINK: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B014JMLV66

BLURB:

21 books, many full length novels, over a $40 value! 


It’s time to howl at the moon and let loose the beast! 

Bears, wolves and lions, oh my! This 21 BOOK Excite Spice MEGA Bundle lets you sink your teeth into all the hot, sexy shifters you could ever dream up! Over 375,000 words of paranormal prose with powerful, protective alphas looking for their fated mates. 

Twenty-one great erotica and erotic romance authors will take you back to the wild, where raw passion rules, and primitive need dominates all. From lions, to tigers, to bears, these shifters will bring out the animal in you. 

It’s time to howl at the moon and let loose the beast! 

This EXCITE SPICE bundle is on sale for a LIMITED TIME.

K!NDLE UNL!MITED MEMBERS – DOWNLOAD THIS BOOK F*R*E*E! 

Check out the start of several of the stories.  

Lucky by Ryanne Hawk

The tattoo parlor reminded Cecelia Marks of a Goth den, full of black walls, red furniture, and low lighting with patchouli floating on the air, along with the unmistakable scent of ink. She’d wanted a new piece for a few months but had to save the money and find the right design to remind her of her new life. And everything she’d left behind.
She walked over to the long modern sofa and sat on the hard cushion. Why does beautiful furniture have to be so uncomfortable? she thought. So people don’t mill around and stay where they aren’t wanted? Why have them at all, then? Cecelia huffed out an exaggerated sigh and crossed her legs as she perused the shop. A kickass bass beat pumped through hidden speakers. She recognized the band and smiled, and the urge to stand up and get down made her jam on the couch with her arms and head.
She’d learned over the past few horrible years to take joy whenever she found it.
On the walls, black picture frames were scattered in geometric patterns featuring custom tattoo work. She heard faint voices echo from the back, though she couldn’t make out the words.
A male and female were arguing, that much she knew.
A few moments later and the scuff of footsteps made its way toward the front of the shop where she waited in front of the full wall of windows, tapping her foot on the cement floor, irritated that her artist was a few minutes late for her scheduled appointment.
Cecelia believed in punctuality.
The man who turned the corner and headed straight for her made her sit up straighter in her seat and take notice of more than just his body art. He had thick, almost black hair, shorn close to the sides but longer on top, sort of old school 1950s deco. Think of Grease. God, she loved that movie. He had deep—set eyes, a thick brow, and full lips. Not feminine plump, but sensual, taking her to a place where silken sheets and sexy laughter rang through the night. He had full sleeve artwork, mostly in bright colors, but a few black and white pieces adorned his arms as well.
She blinked and wiped her palms on her leggings before she stood as he approached. He held his hand out and said, “I’m Luke Miller, your artist. Did you bring your design with you?”
Cecelia stumbled over her name for a moment, remembering who she was now, as she said, “I’m Cecilia,” and handed him her printed design. He reached out and his finger touched hers as he took the paper. A jolt like static electricity ran through her body from the mere second of contact. He didn’t move, just stared deep into her eyes for half a breath.

What the Werepanther Dragged In by Stikki Minaj
Sun Salutations
Morning comes early when you own a coffee shop.
I’d barely had time to flip the door sign from “Time to Switch to Booze” to “Trouble’s Brewin’!” when Anton burst through the door.
“Good lord, what are you doing up at this hour?” My best bud since elementary school, he just let himself behind the bar and poured himself a mug of black coffee before claiming the stool at the end.
He smiled at me over the top of the mug, “Who says I’m just getting up? Girl, I have not been to sleep yet.” He sipped smugly. “Some of us have lives.”
“Some of us have jobs.”
“Ouch. You are mean in the morning. You should get more sleep.”
His real name is Anthony, but he thinks Anton sounds French. We’ve been best friends since fifth grade when I was able to protect him from the mean kids because I was tall. He was the shortest kid in class, I was the tallest. He was dark as cast iron, I had milky white skin that could get a sunburn from a photo of the beach. Now he’s well over six feet tall and I’m still the 5’8” I hit in sixth grade. Our races stayed the same, though.
Our backgrounds were different too——he’s an only child and I have eight sisters;his parents were doctors and recent immigrants from Ethiopia, my mom is a witch and my dad disappeared when I was two, under mysterious circumstances that may or may not have involved trolls——but when we discovered our shared love of show tunes and Animaniacs, we were inseparable. I kept him from getting beat up until he was big enough to fend for himself and he told me when it was time to stop wearing hair scrunchies.
I’m Kateri Surreal, eldest of the simmering cauldron of crazy that is the Surreal sisters. I’m “the responsible one,” which is just as sexy as it sounds, but it was that or “the one with no tits” or “the one with the coffee shop.” My sisters are off having adventures and shit and I wake up at 5 am every day to open Witch’s Brew and caffeinate my little corner of Brooklyn. I live in the weeny little apartment above the shop with my cat, Gomez.
Oh, and yes, my mom is actually a witch. So am I, although I’m far less eye—of—newt Olde Schoole than she is. My brewing is mostly limited to coffee and mild hexes on people who double park in front of the shop. I also sell occult jewelry to the goth girls that want to look Wiccan and freak out their parents. You know, pentagrams with crystal centers, snake rings with jeweled eyes. None of it is charmed, though, just ugly. My rack of candles and sage smudge bundles bring in the New Agey old ladies in flowing linen and jangly bracelets. The usual crowd that want to believe that magic is real.

I mean, magic is real, of course, but you can’t just buy the right supplies and suddenly you can do it. It’s magic, not arts and crafts.

Thanks for reading excerpts from Paws and Claws, hope you enjoyed,
Anita